You know when you are no longer married or have your best friend near you, you start to find and discover yourself all over again. I married young; I was 20 when I tied the knot. I never fully had the experience and independence that most people do in those years because of being married. For 11 years and then some, I thought he was the one and went head over heels for him.
The truth of the matter is that at first, I was, of course, sad and scared when I realized the divorce was going to happen. I felt alone and mad. Despite that, I had to change my mindset. I had to change what I was thinking and figure out how to overcome and gain closure.
Once I started to work on my mindset, I realized that I love being on my own. I LOVE IT!
- Leftovers. I have found that I can save money by eating leftovers. I will actually eat them until they are gone and not mind! Rather than eating them to save money, why waste food?!
- No need to cook anything fancy. I don’t need to make full entrees and fancy food that will sit in the fridge for days and be wasted. I used to cook so much, never eat the remainder, and end up throwing it out. Now, some days I don’t really cook at all. We might have sandwiches, pizza, or chicken nuggets. I try to keep our food balanced, don’t get me wrong, but there are days we spoil that a little.
- No one to complain. There is nothing worse than coming home after a long day and being nagged. I love being able to wake up in the morning on my own, have those moments alone, and clear my head mentally so I can prep for a great day.
- No real need to worry. If the house isn’t clean or the laundry isn’t done, I don’t have to worry about feeling guilty and rushing to tidy. I don’t have to ask for help; I can just do it whenever I get around to it.
- Better finances. I know that I don’t go out and spend my money foolishly on anything that I don’t need. The desire to go to the gas station and the store all the time to be happy and spend money vanished. I can manage my money and budget quite well now.
- New friendships. When you go through a divorce, you lose friends or remove them from your life because you don’t want to choose sides. You must find new friends that can relate to what you are going through. I have made so many new friends that I couldn’t even imagine living without them.
I have learned to embrace the whole divorce journey and being on my own. You need to find the beauty in a new chapter; otherwise, you will live a miserable life for the rest of your days. I can live the way I want to without feeling bad or guilty about it now.
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